How to be Confident

People want to be more confident for all types of reasons; public speaking, playing sports, talking to strangers, job interviews and all areas of peoples lives. Confidence is easy to learn, as people with low confidence often don’t know how to change the daily patterns they unconsciously run in their mind which makes them feel low in confidence.

You can easily learn how to be more confident by practicing a couple of easy to learn techniques, one which I will teach you today:

Boosting Confidence

1. Imagine you could see a confident version of you standing in front of you, look at how this confident you stands, breaths and acts. Notice your gestures, how the confident you talks and moves. Become aware of everything that makes this confident you confident.
2. Now, imagine stepping into this confident you so you can see the world from the eyes of the confident you. See what you can see, hear what you can hear and feel the confidence flowing through your body.
3. Notice in front of you their is an even more confident you standing their, looking more confident, full of self belief with eyes that have that extra twinkle as you emanate loads of charisma.
4. Step into this more confident you and notice that in front of you is an even more confident you, more passionate, more confident, more powerful. See the world from these eyes and hear what you can hear and notice how confident you now feel.
5. Keep stepping into even more confident you’s until you feel overwhelming confidence flowing through you and notice where this feeling is inside you, become aware of your breathing and how you hold yourself. Notice any positive self talk you are saying to yourself.

Complete this exercise everyday for 5 days and notice how each day you become more confident quicker then the day before.

If you want to be more confident you can learn to be as confident as a comedian in just one day!

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How to make quick changes in your life….for the better

This article will highlight some common traits that negative people use to help them stay negative. If you comply with any of these common pitfalls you can make a change by following the links below

• Stop Jumping negative people will always jump to conclusions in every situation, they often assume they know what is going to happen and often have no evidence to back this up. This often leads people to think that everyone is out to get them as they take everything someone says or does as a negative against them. People who jump to conclusions will often not live their life by trying new things as they conclude that they will not have a good time, again this thought is never backed up with evidence.
• Mountains out of molehills negative people will often make mountains out of molehills; by taking small set backs as a big barrier to their goal. Compare this to positive people who take every set back as an opportunity to learn;Edison took 1000 attempts to invent the light bulb, if he gave up we would all be sat in darkness.
• Making it personal do you believe that they are taking about you? When troubled by low self esteem many people will truly believe that friends and colleagues are talking about them and that this conversation is negative. In truth most people have better things to talk about, so don’t take every look, and conversation as an excuse to feel down – it’s not always about you and when it is how do you know its not a positive conversation?
• Living in the past for many of us we have had a troubled past, this could be being bullied as a child at school or having to struggle through poverty. All your experiences have built the person you are, if you have had a troubled past you need to use this experience to motivate you to have a better future, remember the more you think about negative instances the more negative you will feel.

Time to make a change

If you struggle with low confidence, low self esteem or a lack of happiness you need to make some real changes. Life is about living and you need to live your life. If you live your life in the past remembering negative past events, or you make mountains out of molehills, taking everything personal or maybe you always jump to the wrong conclusions?

You can change the way you feel and the way you live your life in just 12 weeks! What to do next? Click: Online Coaching Course for Motivation and Confidence

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Boosting Self Esteem

Why do some of us feel confident and others lack self belief? How come others have it good, while for some everything we try doesn’t work out? What is the difference between someone who enjoys their life and those that feel like they have nothing to live for?

The key to boosting your self belief and to feel more confident is by changing your Limiting Beliefs. A limiting belief is a belief that stops you being your best in anything that you do, a limiting beliefs limits us and makes us feel emotionally negative.

If you want to change your low self esteem change your limiting beliefs, which means you need to ask yourself “what are my limiting beliefs?”

Common limiting beliefs include:

• “Everyone is out to get me”
• “Nothing ever works out for me”
• “I fail at everything”
• “I’m useless”
• “I’m rubbish at driving/cooking/relationships/making friends/job interviews”
• “I can never pass exams”
• “I never win anything”

Need to feel more Confident? Attend the “Funny Thing About Confidence Course” Confidence Course

As you can tell from the above list, limiting beliefs are general which means they need challenging. If you have low self esteem, you will tell yourself (and others) that “limiting belief” you will then find evidence to back this limiting belief up.

As an example, lets take “I never win anything” so you go to a raffle or bingo game and lose, in a negative tone you say “I never win anything” and this new evidence (not wining at bingo or not picking out a winning raffle ticket) adds strength to your limiting belief until you never try at any games because “I never win anything”

Collecting evidence happens all the time with all limiting beliefs and can be very dangerous when your limiting belief is “I always pick the wrong partner” or “My life is the worst, I don’t deserve to live” when we truly believe are limiting beliefs they often turn into self fulfilling prophecies…which adds more evidence to your limiting belief.  

Overcome Your Limiting Belief and Increase Your Self Belief.

Lets look at the “I never win anything” limiting belief, to change this belief you need to question your belief – “when was the last time I won something” Answer “2 ½ years ago when I won £5 on a scratch card” this starts to break down the belief, “so I sometimes win things..”

Question all your limiting beliefs and find evidence why the limiting belief is WRONG, continue to question one belief until you start to really doubt it.

To learn more about building confidence and reducing negative beliefs complete the 12 Week Online Coaching Course and see the difference in your life.

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Self Confidence

I have always been fascinated with how people’s minds work – why are some people confident while others are nervous wrecks? Today I will teach you the secrets to boosting your confidence and explain how we are all motivated through Pain and Pleasure.

People with low self esteem and a lack of confidence view the world through a different set of eyes then confident people. When preparing to do any activity from asking a stranger on a date, applying for a new job, talking up in staff meetings or even wanting to get of your house to try something different, a confident person will look at the Pleasure of these activities and the Pain of not doing them.

The difference here is a person lacking self esteem will look at the Pain of these activities and the Pleasure of not doing them.

The Carrot or the Stick

To best understand motivational Pain and Pleasure is through an example. Imagine your sat in a team meeting at work and the boss is discussing a new way of working and through your own experience you know this idea has many potential pitfalls that the manger has not discussed or thought about, pitfalls that could cost the organisation money which long term could even lead to potential job cuts.

So, do you speak up or not? It all depends on how you view the situation – through Pain or Pleasure. Before we make most decisions we think about what we are going to do/say/act like, in our mind, often playing a movie of this potential future event.  

Generally if you have no confidence and low self esteem, your movie will be full of pain – you will see yourself speaking out in the meeting, you might picture yourself stumbling your words, or hear your boss shouting your ideas down or even picture your colleagues laughing at you. This Pain movie will not inspire you to speak, so you think what if I do nothing; in this movie you say nothing and nothing bad (painful) can happen to you – this is a form of pleasure.

The Funny Thing About Confidence – New Confidence Building Course Staring in  2012

Confident people will think differently, they will visualise themselves talking out in the meeting, and the will see everyone in their movie being really interested in what they say, the boss being amazed by this deep understanding of the potential pitfalls and may even see the whole of the meeting delegates standing, clapping and cheering – pleasure.  The may think about not speaking out and view themselves feeling frustrated and angry about not feeling confident enough about speaking out to stop this potential mess and money/job loss – a form of Pain

The funny thing is, in reality we don’t know what will happen if we speak out in a meeting, if we ask a stranger out on a date or if we try a new activity, what we visualise is what you think will happen, not will actually happen. Which means if you change your internal representation you will change the way you feel.

We are all motivated by pain and pleasure; one donkey may be motivated to work as he will receive a carrot as an award, while another donkey may work because he doesn’t want to be beaten with a stick.

To learn more confidence building techniques and to feel more confident you need to change how you view the world, to make a lasting change download the 12 Week Online Coaching Course for Confidence and Motivation today.

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5 Big Mistakes Depressed People Make

Research has shown that depressed people continue to make the same mistakes, taking them deeper into the spiraling circle of depression. To break this loop and to feel more confident, understand the 5 common mistakes and use the suggestions to change the direction of your life and your confidence levels.

1. Dressing to Success Depress

Psychological studies have proven that the way you dress affects your confidence levels. When you wear, old, scruffy and/or dirty unfitting clothes you will automatically feel down. Whereas the opposite happens when you wear new, fitted and stylist clothes, you feel more confident about yourself. In actual fact your physiology changes when you believe you look good. The same rule applies with your good or bad hair style, your personal hygiene levels and your fitness/health.

2. Heavy Head

Your mind and body work as one and the wording people use evidences this “I’m feeling down” – head hanging down. You can see depressed/emotional people by their posture and body language; slumped shoulders, lethargic movements and head lowered – looking towards the floor, these are all signs off people in a negative state. The interesting fact here is, if you physically stand up, hold you head up high, make eye contact with others, you will automatically feel more confident – this is instantaneous.

3. Negative Self-Talk

One thing all negative people have in common is that they all use negative self talk, sometime without really realizing it, often looking for the negatives in every situation. This has been learnt overtime as no-one is born negative. To overcome this you can re-train your subconscious mind by purposely looking at all the positives in every situation in your home, work, activities/events and in every day situations. Start now by listing all of your skills, strengths and qualities. If your negative self-talk is getting you down book an NLP Life Coach Session to delete this crippling negative self talk in just one session.

4. Wanting Everything, Getting Nothing

Many negative people will want everything “I want to be a millionaire, I want a new Car, I want a pay rise, I want a good life, I want to be happy” and want it now. I agree it is good to have goals, but many negative people will want everything Now and are not willing to wait, when they don’t achieve their goals they put it down to their personal abilities – blaming themselves. Confident people are happy to work hard for their goals and will view every knock-back as an opportunity to improve. To overcome this start by having small goals – if you want a new car, the first goal should be to pick which model you want, your second goal would be to decide how much you are willing to spend on a car, etc. As you achieve your small goals your big goals will fall into place naturally.

5. It’s All About Me.

Do you focus on you? Many unhappy people go into situations looking at what they can get out of it, what’s in-it for them? They don’t think about completing selfless acts, helping others for free and making a good contribution when there is nothing in it for them. But there missing out, as the more you contribute through volunteering, giving someone at the till 50p who has gone over their predicted bill and has no spare change or helping someone cross the road, you will feel good about yourself and this feeling increases your positive emotions and personal confidence.

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